Why Do We Worry?

Are you someone who never worrying? Do you take life easy? Or you are someone like me, who can be chilled some days but majority of the time just unnecessary stressing out on everything. Do you worry a lot, or just a little? The amount actually doesn’t matter, because we all know it is just pointless and horrible way of spending our time. So then why do we even do it?

I don’t know why but I am constantly worrying about simple things, such as accidents when driving someone else’s car, booking an expensive flight ticket and making a mistake with name, getting through visa process and being denied, packing suitcases if they will be fitting and accepted at airport, or lost… So many tiny things I can be stressing over.

You cannot add any time to your life by worrying about it.
Matthew 6:27, ERV

I have read this entire passage from Matthew like trillion times. I actually read a lot of messages about worry in general from the Bible because so far this is the most annoying bad habit I identified in myself. I mean, obviously I have plenty, but the one taking out a lot of quality time from my life is definitely this one. Even if I should be worried about anything, why can’t I just take it easy and leave it for the future/God/Universe/Life to be handled whenever it is gonna be managed? I can’t change it by worrying.. can I? Most of the time it seriously just making things worst.

I remember one flight of mine on 17th January 2017. It was the morning around 6am time when I had to leave my beloved second home: Benin Republic, West Africa. That day I had nothing I wanted less then to leave my African family, and that place where I learned to be calm even if things were on fire around me. Literally. The place where I get to know God more, and learned about how he takes care of me even if I have nothing to take care of myself. (If you are not religious just use universe or life or luck or whatever fits your believes better..) Where a family opened their homes for me when I was about to get to the streets as a homeless in a 3rd world place. And they not just accepted me, the broken European girl, to sleep in their house, but they made me be family. I had been at that time after 8 months of barley eating proper food, getting sick and malaria, and being in a kind of toxic environment, I was finally freed by random kindness of a great African woman.

So what I was saying is, I was in a real though situation while I was volunteer without any income for like 8 months. Some days we went to sleep without food. Although I can tell you guys, I was less and less stressed and worried after the rock bottom hit. I learned to not expect to have income, or food, or security, or even a place for fixed over my head. I felt like I am rocking uncertainty. I can face with any insecurity. And I was in peace.. mostly! I mean more then when I am in my own country where I can be worrying over if there is no internet for an hour. Meanwhile I was without any connection over a month once in 2016. So compare to my usual self at my home country, I was handling life easier as I learned it in that new environment.

That January morning, I was leaving from Cotonou, to Casablanca. And with 3 hours layover to London, where I had a friend to host me in Reading. I knew nothing about anything what will be in the UK for me without much money. But I wasn’t worrying. After checked in they said 2 hours delay, which turned to like 4. I wasn’t even stressing. I was blessing God to give me more time in Benin, even if it was only sitting in the airport.. but technically I was still there, and happy. Although you must figured that this meant I would miss my second flight from Morocco. Still, I was not at all stressing. You can see some days, I am rocking life in terms of worrying. These are red flags most the days normally to anyone, right? What would you do?

The strangest thing happened on the flight when we finally departed. We had a little turbulence and I started to freak out silently, inside me. I guess it was everything – sadness of leaving, the insecurity comes from missed connection etc. – all together because I usually don’t worry over little plane shaking. I will never forget what came to my mind in that moment: why you worry of plane crash, or getting accident when the plane is a bit shaky? If that is what God planned it will happen. no matter worry or not. You should be knowing that no worry changes anything. If you can’t handle this totally average life, and these tiny things causing you huge worries, how could you handle the truth of God/universe/life? How could you face with death which one point or an other really will come??! How could God trust you with bigger challenges if you can not even manage to pull yourself together and be in the simple moment of everyday life situation without any stress?

I was instantly feeling better. This thought gave me peace again when I started to loose it. Still I try to ask myself these questions when I am in worrysome situation.

Although I still haven’t yet invented and implemented the best methods for myself to stop me every single time I worry. Last 24 hours I pre-applied for visa to Ivory Coast electronically and even without zero reason to be denied I was stressing. I am still kind of, as I will get the visa be accepted only once at the boarder in Abidjan next Monday. I just don’t wanna stress anymore…

What are your stress management practices for these kind of cases? I literally have zero reason be worried because I have everything proper, and I have gone through this visa process already once. It seems only my mind is playing with me..

You could say that: “come on Kriszti, you have been traveling the world around and been like 22+ countries, even in the USA. Why are you still stressing for a visa to Africa?” I can’t answer this. It seems this thing – travelling to Africa, expensive plane tickets and visas – is my kryptonite like the one superman was weak around.. I feel always so helpless.

The positive thing is that I identify these cases and try to avoid freaking out more publicly, or like in a more expressed way. More or less with success of collecting the worry and stress inside me… Which we can argue if it is good for your health or no?! But surely better for my environment and people around me, right? :)  I know there is nothing worse then someone stressing out on everything in your company. I just wanna stop it!

What kind of situation is guaranteed to you to worry about? Or more like me: over-worrying? What is your kryptonite situation from this point of view and what can you do to make it less stressful to your environment and for yourself? Please share with me  here: in comment section or by any of my contacts. I really would like to hear about some practices you are using and your advice. Thanks in advance! :)

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