Open letter to All Empaths

Some situations instantly changing our perspective of the world and shaping our priorities in moments. Today was like that to me… some very important life lessons presented themselves in front of my eyes.

The most important lesson is to never be afraid to invest into yourself. Who will join your company, fight for your vision or invest in you, if you can’t?

Nurture yourself, like you would cultivate your loved one. Your husband, wife, child, partner, boyfriend or girlfriend… why is it always them to care for? Imagine you used 10% of that money, time or energy you are providing to them on yourself once a while?

To whom is more worthy to invest into your own self, then you?

Spend that money on your own ideas and not to give out fancy gifts, or provide to people especially who don’t deserve it. Because many people won’t actually deserve your precious life.

Why life? The money you worked for is an exchange procedure: you give your time, energy, knowledge and skills etc. mainly your own life to a business and you get money for it. So do you want to spend your entire life paying for other’s happiness?

I don’t say that you should stop helping out people and friends. Or do not find a profession or start a social enterprise where you aim to help others. I consider serving others as the most important thing on this earth.

Must realize that, instead of trying desperately to figure out what would make others happier, and satisfied and full… Spend ( at least part of) that energy and time to figuring out what would make you better and more content with your own life?

  • Do you want to start your own business for years, but somehow there is never enough resource for that? Consider Yourself First.
  • Do you think twice to buy a coffee of $4 because you found a nice gift to your loved one? Consider Yourself First.
  • Can you think about the last time you gifted yourself with your own time? Consider Yourself First.

It is not about being selfish. It is just about balancing. If you don’t make yourself truly happy, you will never be happy. That is the truth. If you are not content, you can not help others in need.

Make others happy or support them if…

  1. wanted: realistic, and serious need is present or kind of either asked for it, or implied the support is welcomed and needed.
  2. unconditional: on what you have provided expecting return (subconsciously even) without actually expressed it at the moment of exchange of deeds, is NO-NO.
  3. realistic: fit the love-language of yours and the other one.
  4. priority: do not over-sacrifice which will interrupt your normal life needs to be satisfied.
  5. timely: never give when it’s not only momentarily stretching your limits.
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